Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Turkey Day, my children.  Life is changing, and this blog is going to morph into Sister Krissie Explains it All (thanks, Clarissa).  In the last three years we've (Jenny Crusie, Lani Diane Rich, Toni Causey, Barbara Samuel, and more) have banded together in the noble causing of reclaiming our fabulousness, which had gotten somewhat tarnished over the years.  Being fabulous is an ongoing endeavor, but it's not a task or a battle.  It's a joy.

This will still be my blog, but the others will have blogging rights and they'll pop in when the mood strikes them and they have something brilliant to say, plus I'll have other people swing on by.  If you find me incredibly self-indulgent and tedious ("what?  Nevah!") I'll tweet and FB when someone else is coming on.

I'm going to talk about everything under the sun, and I'll fill you in on my Dark Secret, but not today (and it's not a secret - I get depressed).  Today is about being grateful, thankful, joyful.

So here's my list.  List yours.  The comments section on this is annoying right now -- so even if it doesn't show up right away they'll appear.

1.  Most of all, I'm grateful for feeling better.  I've been down, waaaaay down, for a while now, but they shifted my meds (thank God for SSRIs and their cousins) and I'm feeling much better.

2.  Christmas is coming and I have thrown myself into it.  Instead of concentrating on loss (and in my case it's pretty massive) I'm going to concentrate on all I've every loved about the holidays.  I love every holiday -- I used to make my kids a Hanukkah dinner complete with makeshift menorah and latkes and applesauce.  Which reminds me, I really need to get a menorah.  Because the holidays are all about the return of light in every sense.

3.  I'm grateful for my fabulous grandchildren even though they live too far away.

4.  I'm grateful for my children, warts and all.  Life hasn't been easy for either of them, and I tried too hard to spare them, but they're my heart.

5.  But my soul is Richie, who I married almost 40 years ago, and I've never stopped adoring him, even on the rare occasions when he annoys me.

6. And I'm so grateful for the gift of writing.  It brings me such joy and heartbreak, and I'll write till the day I die.  My mother was writing into the last year of her life, and she was just shy of 98 when she died.

7.  I'm grateful for the beautiful snow and the fact that I don't have to go anywhere.  (Yes, it means I have to do all the cooking, and I don't have to worry about anyone else dealing with the snow because no one else is coming, and I could be gloomy about that, but instead I'll just rejoice in the gorgeous snow)

8.  I'm grateful I'm not interested in going out shopping.

You know, I could keep on forever with all the things i'm grateful.  When I was in the darkest place every happy thought was followed by a dark caveat. But I'm challenging myself to find a bright caveat to all the dark thoughts.  As in my snow example.  As in ... my grandchildren are too far away and my son is miserable, but he needs the distance to grow up and I don't want them growing up in a world where people are always yelling.

Or yes, I miss my mother, no matter how messed up many of my years with her were, but I rejoice that she lived so long (she wanted to), never lost her sharpness, and I don't need to regret that I didn't take excellent care of her.

So happy Thanksgiving!  Don't worry about calories, but don't make yourself sick.Ask for help.

And be grateful!